February 12, 2020

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10 ways to pick yourself up when you're feeling blue

February 7, 2017

When you're in a funk, the hardest thing to do is get yourself out of it. It's almost comfortable there, especially when you don't have the energy to do anything! When I'm in a funk, I try to incorporate a few of these little self care practices into my daily life. And the most important rule when you deal with sadness, chronic depression, or you're just having a bad day:


Be kind to yourself.


Treat yourself how you would treat a dear friend who was feeling the same way. It's not your fault you're in a funk, but it is your decision to stay there. It's okay to acknowledge where you're at, what you're feeling. Let yourself feel it. But have grace and forgiveness with yourself. And then spend some time on yourself. Here are a few of my favorites:



Take a bubble bath. Bonus points: add some essential oils or Epsom salts, light some candles, read a motivational book, play some music you just LOVE. Heck, play some sad music and cry your eyes out if you need to. For your own safety and also to give your mind a break, leave your phone out of it. Unless it's playing the music- but maybe keep it at a safe distance from the water.


Go for a walk. It is absolutely amazing what some fresh air can do. Whether you go by yourself (maybe bring the pepper spray and be aware of your surroundings... it's sad that I even have to say that about our world, but that's another blog post for another day). Enjoy the fresh air, bring a friend and talk to them, or just talk to yourself. Moving your body, getting some blood circulating, and breathing will make you feel better, not to mention, productive for getting out of your cozy blanket cocoon.


Do some yoga. Or just stretch. You can find so many free yoga videos on YouTube, you don't even need a DVD. I like to find short ones, about 15 or 20 minutes long. Again, moving your body and breathing will make you feel so much better.


Work out. I had to say it. Although, I know this is way easier said than done if you're feeling depressed. But if you're feeling depressed about your body, this might be the drive you need to get started on a healthier lifestyle.


Do something creative. Sometimes it's just therapeutic to paint. I like to buy a few blank canvases, pick out some colors that speak to me, and paint. You don't even have to be any good. Just do it. Whether you end up using it to decorate your house with or it ends up in the garage. The end goal doesn't matter in this exercise. What matters is focusing on the creation in front of you, as you are creating it. Taking it one step at a time, and expressing your feelings through some type of medium.


Create and complete a small, short term goal. Or do a small project you've been wanting to do. I say small project because the point here is to make yourself feel good. When you accomplish a task that has been on your to-do list, it boosts your self confidence and self worth. If you try to take on something that might be too big right now in your fragile state and you don't finish it, it will actually make you feel worse about yourself.


Read an inspiring self-help book. I discovered "self help" books when I was about 19. The first one I remember reading, or that stuck with me the most, was Why Men Love Bitches. At the time I was going from one bad relationship to another, and I just knew there was something I was doing to allow these types of guys in my life. This book caught my eye at Barnes and Noble, I read the first few pages there in the store and knew that I needed this book. "From doormat to dreamgirl" It changed my life. I recommend it to any woman who can't seem to find a good man. It made me realize that I need to respect myself in order for a man to respect me, and so much more. Shortly after finishing that book, my amazing now-husband walked into my life, and I accepted his love and affection because I realized I deserved it from a nice guy.  Another book I just finished reading and totally recommend for anyone who feels like they aren't reaching their potential is You Are a Badass. I think I may reread it because it's that good, I want to make sure I retain all of it. Honestly, I need all the reminding in the world about my self-confidence, and reading a good book, under a blanket on the couch with a cup of tea is one of my favorite self care routines.


Unplug. From your phone, from your ipad, from your computer. Anything that has a little bright screen reminding you of a) how imperfect your life is right now and b) all the horrors happening in this world. Especially if you are feeling particularly stressed out about other people, their opinions, or their drama... UNPLUG! Even if you're not necessarily stressed out from social media or the news... its nice to just turn your phone off for a day. It's almost like putting up a sign to the electronic universe that you are not available right now. Right now is your time to give yourself a mental break.


Do something you want to do. Whether it's taking yourself to a movie you want to see, get takeout from your favorite restaurant (or get a table for one if you're bold enough), watching your favorite guilty-pleasure TV show. Do something that you want to do, regardless of the people around you. Do it by yourself. Treat yourself to the things you want. It's okay, I promise.


One last thing, but it just might be the most helpful:

Be mindful of your self-talk. Meaning, being aware of what you say to yourself in your head or out loud. We are so mean to ourselves, we say things we would NEVER say to a friend or loved one. Yet we totally bash ourselves for simple, everyday human errors. I want you to try and catch yourself in the act. When you do, I want you to remind yourself to be nice. That's it. It seems so simple yet most of us don't even think about it. Be nice to yourself. You are the only you that you've got. You are the only you in the world. You can be your own best friend and biggest fan. You can be your own worst critic and enemy. You are not perfect. But no one is perfect. Even the model on the magazine cover, or the celebrity playing a fictional character in a movie- they are not perfect, either. We've all said and done things we wish we hadn't. Most of us have days where we can't explain why we're sad... we just are. All you can do is start again. Start again tomorrow or right this minute. But you are in charge of your own happiness. So go love yourself.






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